On New Year's Eve 2004, I broke my personal mythology - which was a belief I had about myself that limited me from accepting any other path or opportunity that presented itself. My personal mythology was about being single, being lonely, being a "professional muse," a "lonely domme," a woman too twisted, fractured, jaded and "Other" to ever find my 0ne True Love. In fact, I'd developed an entire self-deprecating lingo to wrap my cold heart in - about being a "mid-life crisis solution" for the older men I dated, or a "finishing school for boys" for men my age or younger. With my language, I was already reinforcing the feeling of being set apart. With my language, I was already robbing myself of hope. [ as aforementioned, as a result of this myth-breaking, the man who has now become my husband arrived in my Inbox the morning after my ritual ]
When I realized that I was not only creating but sustaining and reinforcing these linguistic walls, I realized if I could create the personal mythology of me, I could also break and remake these core beliefs about myself. There are many ways to change your personal mythology - the beliefs about yourself that make up who you feel you are, and how you present your image to the world. Your personal mythology is your set of beliefs - these create the image you project to yourself within, as well as the image you project outward to the world. This image is your personal brand.
Here are 4 steps to break your own myth, and building a new one:
1. In the context of your [ relationships / abilities / career goals / etc ] - how do you see yourself? What do you believe you can do? Start a list with two columns: Title Column 1 "I believe I can. . " and Column 2 "I don't believe I can. . " Fill out both columns.
2. Examine your columns and decide which beliefs you wish to change about your personal myth - what would you like to let go of? Acknowledge that you are ready to grow beyond the old definitions of yourself. You have the power and the gift to choose who you want to be. You can choose to transcend your parents' or cultural beliefs and rules, you can choose to self-create. Your personality is not static - we are built to evolve, transmute, transform and self-actualize. Notice what you say about what you think you can't do. These are your limiting beliefs - which create the invisible barriers which define your personal mythology.
3. Visualize who/how you would rather be. If you were the best version of yourself, what qualities, habits and personal rituals would you have? Be grandiose. Take a few deep breaths and imagine breathing in those qualities and beliefs until your breath animates the vision of yourself. Design your new personal myth, decide that you are the boss of your own self and can authorize this image upgrade, and ratify your change by visualizing the strategy and execution of actions!
4. Reinforce and ratify the change with belief and action. Imagine that the old myth is a like an ill-fitting, out-of-style outfit that you would never wear again, like an acid-washed denim jacket and jeans, or MC Hammer-esque parachute pants. Visualize your new myth as a new and improved, updated, au courant wardrobe that makes you feel fresh, new, and powerful when you put it on. Wear it every day. Live it every day. Notice the difference between what the Acid-Washed Ex-myth You and the Fresh New Style Myth You would do. Expect a little resistance to the unfamiliar - but push through and choose the NEW YOU by taking a deep breath and making the NEW YOU more familiar by acting in accordance with your new and improved personal mythology.
Feel free to let me know if you need help!