Apart from my wonderful new job, I run several parallel processes in my life. I've been writing on the web under different avatars since 2000. Spilling my most visceral, messy-human, seething feelings before a strange and select cultivated audience of readers, I felt liberated in the safety of anonymity. No one could judge me or hold me accountable.
I wrote these secret diaries for almost 5 years straight, throughout the darkest and most confusing times of my own personal evolution, while the dot com bubble puffed itself up, then imploded, leaving so many people laid off and unemployed. I myself made it through at least 5-6 rounds of layoffs without a scratch, being promoted through the ranks of high-tech advertising, but also taking on more and more responsibilities as my support teams were swallowed up by quarterly downsizing.
Eventually, this kind of overclocking, stress and overworking absolutely took its toll on me, my eyes, my wrists, my fingers, hands, arms, neck, and back were killing me and I was an absolute wound-up ball of stress 24/7. I had no sense of work/life balance. By the time I got home from this job I just collapsed in a little heap, and de-animated, recharging my battery for another day at the grind of artificially created client-service deadline stress. Blogging under my anonymous avatar was my main "social" outlet. I was forced to work part time, then not at all, as my physical pains overtook me and to get relief, I had to file for disability, and jump through the insurance hoops of verifying this "cumulative work injury." 2.5 years of intense therapy and state-funded "occupational therapy" and "vocational rehabilitation" later - I became a hypnotherapist, and learned for myself (also to teach others) how to visualize, breathe, relax, find balance, and create optimal mindsets and realities for each day.
Which brings me to 2007, where I write openly under my real name, and let people know who I am. I'm now officially a screenwriter, with other projects in the works. I've started an artistic movement for Filipino Arts which just launched our corresponding site/monthly e-zine called The Balikbayan Renaissance. I participate/present in/at Barcamp LA (check out my first little article for them). I write for my colleague Heather's collaborative metaphysically-flavored weblog, Daily Mantra. I still take on a few select clients for hypno-coaching. I teach monthly productivity workshops. I work full-time as a Sales&Marketing Manager as well as a Social Media Specialist. I'm 21 weeks pregnant with my first baby.
I don't really get stressed anymore - sometimes frustrated, but I never feel helpless, and those feelings evaporate quickly as my own optimal mindset resets my focus on my blessings, my goals, my vision. Little annoyances are fleeting and they just don't stick, and I don't let them get in my way.
I think I've locked into my own personal productivity groove, where I *can* move at the speed of light, but from my perspective, I'm standing totally still. Time is just a sequence of ordered events, right?
There's time enough for everything.
And what a lucky woman i am to have you as triple threat - collaborator, coworker, friend ,confidant and inspiration...and you know I don't exaggerate Ms. C.
Posted by: Jennifer Fader | March 21, 2007 at 08:15 PM